I thought so intensely of you, Before this life, just so. As if there were nothing more. But I say you were there In my thoughts. Just so I found you, Just so, beyond my self. You alone without shadow, Unmoving, beside me. Your whites between black, The light in your dark centers. I wanted you so intensely, You before anything… Just so within everything, Just so without, Day, night. I lived you so intensely, Believe me… Who knows where I gaze or what I’m doing now from the eternity I’ve gained.

 

This glance is for you to see. Is there anything more than you? To the sea, I’ll look to the sea… Is this all there is of the sea? Staring only to see something else… Nature cringes in front of me. Landscapes pass by the second. Clouds beneath my feet, you in my head. At stars, I’m looking at the stars… You’re here looking with me. I wonder what happened to the others… They had words, and enlightened life.

 

A candle was burning in the room of a house. There was a cat in the house too. As nights went by of their own accord The candle burned and the cat played. On one such night when the candle burned The cat became lost in its game. In eyes hungry for play The candle flame burned, The cat stared, And in the flickering flame of the candle A toying pleasure called out. The cat, growing in its games, grew too In its own child-like way, Went round and round, walked slowly Towards the toy-like flame. A glance, once more, and again it looked And stretched a paw To the flickering candle flame. He appeared confused Until his whiskers burned… Didn’t seem to believe That the flame he’d seen for the very first time Could burn him. The cat grew as it played, The candle grew cold as it burned. Time stepped between them, Quickened its pace. And something seemed strange Between the burning of one And the games of the other. But the cat grew as it played, Slowly losing the game. And the candle grew small as it burned, Slowly losing its flame. The cat, as it plays, will burn, The candle, lighting, growing small, will burn. The one getting small will brighten as it burns, The one growing big will learn as it’s burnt. After the candle’s burning And the cat’s playing There remained In a room of a house In the middle of the night Two people Silently staring.   The candle burned to its end, The cat grew and went. Games dissolved into nights Into a silent insomnia. In the memories and thoughts Of two people A cat and a candle Came and went. Wherever a candle burns now, Wherever a cat plays, The shadows of each are entwined and reflect… Today is like yesterday, Yesterday like today. The candle scratches my hands And the cat’s paws light up my past.

 

A day doesn’t pass everyday. .

 

Don’t know what was in her hair. Was it the wind blowing madly, Or just the way I saw it… Whatever it was, I loved it.

 

Your hair would waver in the wind. Nearby, I used to watch you. The sun would burn, the sea be burnt. You’d talk, I’d listen. You used to smile. You’d be quiet, pensive, Walking with me hand in hand. The road would come to an end. Then I wouldn’t see you… Years would pass. From far, far away I used to watch you.

 

When I spoke to you I suppose I spoke. To you when I spoke I spoke I suppose. I spoke I suppose when I spoke to you. I suppose I spoke to you when I spoke.

 

White is the color Of time, fire, and death. Write red The color of passion, lies, hatred. Paint blue The clothes of dreams, love, and honor. Draw black The shirt of poverty, hopelessness, and loss.

From DUNYA KACTI GOZUME (1955): ‘Myth’. From SEN SEN SEN (1956): ‘It wasn’t Me’, ‘Sisyphus’, ‘As If’, ‘Her Hair’, ‘I Used to Watch You’. From YUMUSAKLIKLAR DEGIL (1962): ‘Dum’ From YALNIZLIK PAYLASILMAZ (1978): ‘The Story of the Cat Playing with the Candle Flame,’ ‘ Title’.

Poems ©copyright Özdemir Asaf and ©copyright Adam Yaylinari Publishers, Istanbul.

Copyright permission for translation of Özdemir Asaf into English has been given by his publisher. Translations ©copyright 2002 George Messo.

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